KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

A black man from Harlem walked in to a store. He then proceeded to buy a few items using money he had earlier procured by working dilligently.

1,000 people get out of a plane , who hits the ground first? The DEAD guy!!!!

Asians

A man walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

This sentence is a lie.

where does someone with one leg work? -no where this is a recession

where did suzie go when the bomb hit her?? Everywhere

Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

What is worse than breaking your pencil? Flying on a magic carpet

What does the name Joe mean? Joe Mama! Egit

whats wrose than slipping on a banana? Getting Shot in the face.

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

What time is it when an elephant steps on your watch? Time to go to the hospital and get treated for a shattered wrist.

were at work systems r down

I put the word **** in a post. Anti Joke starred it and the joke didn't make sense anymore.

"Knock knock" "The doors open" "Oh, okay"

What did the teacher say to the boy whose dog had just died? Haha, your dog just died.

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE I HAVE AIDS NOW YOU DO TOO

Why is Kim Jong Un so horrible? I forgot the rest of the joke but your mum is a whore

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

What happens when you throw a midget off of a tall building? It dies and the people below get midget on them

Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was dead.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "What will it be tonight?" He then promptly remembers he is on anti-joke.co but is too late to react. The horse has already shit on the floor. This is the fifth time this week that this has happened.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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