no pun intended

Why did Helen Kelley's dog run away I'd run away to if my name was. Ughgughgughgiggughfufh.

Your mom was so fat, She was overweight.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Where would it be hard to find handicapped parking? At the paralympics.

i walk into a bar,and then proceed to be taken out because i am a minor -chuckles

Why did the man cry when he received his meal at McDonalds? They didn't give him a happy meal.

It's all Taggart

What did the pepperoni say to the pepper We are both tacos

Q: why can't women drive? A: because there is no road between the kitchen and the bedroom

Why do women live longer? Once they're sexual and metabolistic hormones are moleculy different from men's, their metabolism is different and act on different organs and vice-versa. Therefore, they live longer. Still, in a worldwide average, more men born than women.

Yo mama so old, she used to babysit Dumbledore

What was the only animal to not board the ark in pairs? Loads of animals because it didn't happen.

Why did the clown go to jail? For 23 charges of rape and murder.

What did Anne Frank say to the Nazis who found her? Please be gentle.

If there are four gay men that come into a bar and need to sit down when all you have is one stool; what do you do? Get three more stools.

Q: What did the skeleton order when he walked into a bar? A: A beer and a mop.

Why did the girl cross the road? Doesn't matter she got hit by a bus.

A Catholic priest has the choice between spending an hour with a young girl or a young boy. Which does he choose? Neither because that's illegal and completely immoral for a priest.

What do you get when John pulls your toe off the waterfall and takes three from an caramel? -6 to the power of golf.

Sometimes black people kill other black people.

A man sees the most beautiful woman he's ever seen on the street. He takes her into a dark alley and r.apes her.

Q:What the difference between a piano and a guitar A: Nothing, there both instruments and i lied about the difference

why were the African, Asian and Mexican men thrown out of the bar the barman was a racist

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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