Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar…. He was shot

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Why do black people drink cool-aid? Because it tastes good.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We are here to inform you that your daughter has died in a drunk driving accident.

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The Pope walks into a bar, the barman says: "What'll it be, Pope?" But the Pope's knowledge of English is tenuous at best. He mumbles something in Latin that the barman doesn't understand. The Pope becomes frustrated and leaves.

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"Docter, docter, I think I have cancer!" "I don't really care."

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The biggest lie in the world . . . I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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Why did the girl kill herself? she was depressed.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Noideer! No.Blind What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still Noideer! No, it's basically dead

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Why wasn't the dog obedient? Because it was dead.

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a homeless man walks into a bar, the bartender and patrons treat him nicely, and sympathize for his current situation.

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Smeg...

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What do you call a person with no arms or legs rolling around in leaves? I don't know that seems like a highly improbable situation

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jibby jobby

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Q: What's wrong with being gay A: Nothing is wrong with anybody because we're all human

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? An ambulance.

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Q: How do you make a clown stop laughing? A: Hit it in the face with an axe

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How do you get five black men in a car? You offer them a good deal, then show them the car fax.

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What's brown and sticky? Shit.

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What happened when the man crossed the road? He lived happily ever after because he looked both ways for traffic.

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Q: How did the black man get to the first branch on the tree? A: He climbed, like the average person.

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A man is walking in the desert, alone and lost, when suddenly he finds a lamp. The man picks up the lamp and to his surprise, a genie bursts out of the lamp ! The genie says to the man: "Thank you, kind man! You have freed me from this prison I have been in for a million years. I am in your dept and will grant you three wishes." The man replies: "Wow, you've been in there for a million years and all you have to give me are three wishes?" The genie was really sad to hear of the man's lack of appreciation and flew away, leaving the man. The man eventually died of starvation and dehydration.

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What do you call a partially deaf obese man? Anything you want, it's unlikely that he'll hear you. If he does manage to catch what you said, your chances of outrunning him are very good considering that he's likely to tire before you, unless you're overweight yourself of course. If this is the case then perhaps you should hit the gym, obesity is a growing problem in the Western world and greatly increases your chance of heart disease and/or diabetes.

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This is a joke...that your supposed to laugh at.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops