Q. What did the buddhist monk say to the hotdog vendor? A. "I'd like a hotdog, please."

On a scale of Casey Anthony to Jerry Sandusky how much do you like kids?

Imagine a scenario Add a Rhubarb Crumble into your scenario Add your mother and father sitting together watching the news in your scenario. Your scenario should take place in an old people's home Add an Olympic athlete doing the splits into your scenario If there were any crane-flies in your scenario, be sure to subtract them at once. Divide your scenario by two. Your scenario should now be a mental image of flying horses and a hippopotamus eating a large salmon mousse. There will be a pig tied to a pair of sunglasses.

Why is siracha taste so good on chicken? Because it compliments the meat.

There was a lil girl in a red hoody skipping to her grandma's house. When she got there she noticed her grandma wasn't home. The lil girl panics and see's a wolf. She hesitates and asks the wolf "Have you seen my grandma" The wolf replies with a yes, shes in the backyard planting flowers.

whats bloop with an m? matthew

why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. What do you call a man who gets a check in the mail every month for doing nothing? A black man

haha

roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme others don't.

what did Harold Camping say to the little girl and boy? "You and your parents are going to die today"

Roses are red Violets are blue This is a poem The End

What is Oedipus' favorite tv show! How I Met Your Mother

What's better than winning the lottery? Winnig the lottery twice.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set a firework off on her face.

Where do baby apes sleep? In apricots

What's worse than rape? Gang rape.

What's the difference between a horse? All legs are of equal length, especially the left one.

What's the difference between a black businessman and a white businessman? Their skin colour.

you had me at "hello", no need to add "you're under arrest"

What did the man say to the waiter when he was about to tip him? I'm not gay, but $20 is $20.

Did you hear about the gay midget? He came out of the cupboard.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs sitting on a doorstep? Whatever his name happens to be

How do you kill a blonde? By irreparably damaging a major organ. The same way you kill anything else.

Q. who's george porchy?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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