It's a man's 100th birthday, and as one of his last wishes he wants to go skydiving. Unfortunately, due to his crippling arthritis, he was unable to pull the rip cord on his parachute and plummeted to his death.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

What drink is dark yellow and freshly squeezed from one of the most healthy snacks? Piss.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What do you call a really small grape? A grape.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Why did the man buy Trojan for his women? It's condom curtsey.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What did Jim say to Bob? Hi Bob.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=LJP1DphOWPs#!

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Im a dog. RUUUFFF!

thumb_up thumb_down +45

3 men were involved in a terrible plane crash. The first man got up, and all he could see was blue. Blue houses, blue cars, blue people. He walked into a house and asked if he could stay there, the kind people complied and let him stay there for the night. When he woke up he could still only see blue. He went down stairs and ate fruit loops, then left in his blue world. The second man got up and all he could see was red. Red houses, red cars, red people. He walked into a house and asked if he could stay there, the kind people complied and let him stay there for the night. When he woke up he could still only see red. He went down stairs and ate cherrieos, then left in his red world. The last man got up, and all he could see was yellow, yellow cars, yellow houses, and yellow poeple. Yet again he walked to a house, and the kind people let him stay the night. Once he woke up, he only could see yellow still. He went down stairs and ate fruit loops and left into his yellow world. So this proves that 2 out of 3 men prefer fruit loops over cherrieos.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

U know what they say about big shoes? Big socks

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Your mother was a hamster, And your father smelt of ElderBerries!

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Herpes, Now you do too.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

A dog walks into a saloon and says "I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw." The patrons are afraid of the talking dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why did the Asian Cross the road? Because the crossing signal went green!

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How many fingers does Charlie Sheen have? 8. and 2 thumbs. just like most everybody else.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A guy trips a blind man.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

why did the chicken cross the road? Does it matter why, it just did.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What happened when the man stuck his hand in the blender? Nothing, it was turned off.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the coconut fall out of the tree? Gravity.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Who won the race across the highway, the Mexican or the Frenchman? Neither, as they were struck by a mac truck when attempting to run across the highway and were both killed instantly on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's worse than an anti-joke? People who don't get the concept of an anti-joke and post regular jokes on this site.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A man walked into a bar because he worked there.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What did the black say when an asian knocked him out? Nothing, he was knocked out

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call a man with a spade in his head? An ambulance.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops