What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

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A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

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What did the kind hearted wolf do when he saw the small, helpless, fluffy bunny? He ate it.

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Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What do you get when you mix a dog with speeding bus? Nothing, you can't mix those two things.

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Duh, its red not ginger, like really really red... Not unlike my eyes, which is a bit of the reason I dye it., I also use colored contact lenses most of the time now.

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What did God say to the snake when the Snake decided to ignore God and just give Eve the apples? Snake what are you doing? Answer me, SNAKE! SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE! *DUN DUN DURUDUN! DU DU DUN! *gunshot* Moral: I just hate thumbs ups, and the comments where I omit this receives those horrible green thumbs instead of them sexy red ones, so there goes.

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Q: how do you catch a bear? A: you dig a hole, fill the hole with ashes, surround the hole with peas, and when the bear comes to take a pea kick him in the ash hole

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Whats black and smells like white paint? A) Black paint!

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What did the Scientist say to the bookstore owner he met? "Hi."

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A man opens his sock drawer, grabs his socks and puts them on.........He dies 5 minutes later.

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After dinner, my girlfriend told me that we should go to my room to play with eachother's toys. It was very fun, I've always enjoyed the plastic dinosaur she decided to bring over.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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Q) Whats wet fishy and gets caught by fishermen? A) fish.

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What's worse than Bieber fever? Yellow fever.

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yo mama so fat, her favorite food is seconds.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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Yo mamma is so nice, when she bakes a batch of cookies, there's enough for everybody.

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what do you call a man who makes fun of womens rights? Single

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What do you do when you see a black child riding a bike? Think to yourself, "Wow you just don't see many kids riding bikes anymore because there too busy playing video games in their basement."

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Why did Billy go into the white van? Because his parents came to pick him up from school.

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Why did Billy fall of his bike HE HAD NO BIKE

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a guy walked into a bar and said "ow!"

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Why does smokey bears wife never have kids? Because every time she gets hot smokey beats he with a shovel

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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