A fat guy eats a twinkie.

what do you get when you have unprotected sex with a hooker? an orgasm

-Can I ask you one question? -Yes. -Thank you.

bill: HEY! your moma so fat bob:so i dont care shes gonna die soon anyway

Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

a rabbi,a priest and minister didn't walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

Your in a building there's no windows ,doors and a sement floors and u only have a mirror and a table how do you get out You look in the mirror see what u saw take the saw saw the table in half two halfs make a hole clime out the hole

Why did the white man cry? Because his mistress, Shanghai, was threatening to tell his wife that they were in a relationship and, out of anger, he bashed Shanghai's head in and she is dead,

fack me in the ace! CC

What's blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF What's white and fluffy? A BUNNY What's pink and fluffy? PINK FLUFF What's brown and fluffy? A PORCUPINE

Ay Bee Cee Dee Ey Ef Gee Haych Eye Jay Kay El Em En Ow Pee Queue Our Es Tee You Vee Doubleyou Ex Why Zed Now you know your ABC, come along and sing with me!

What is invisible and smells like rabbits? Bunny farts.

What's gay, has ten eyes and is gay. One D. Kelvin Yang.

How do stop a clown from laughing? Hit in the face with a hatchet.

What's chris benoit doing? Just hangin in the gym

What's the same between a plane a bird and a piece of celery? They all fly except the celery

why did Sally fall off of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there?

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie

- kellen says to bill "your a fruit cake" - bill say to raj "your a gypsy" - raj says to kellen "you have gingevitis" R.I.P kellen 2012

How do you survive in the wilderness? You nail an orphan to a rock underwater.

Why can't Sally ride a bike? Because Sally's a fish.

How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, you racist.

Your mom's so hairy, she should go to the barber!

What did the gun say to the pencil? Draw

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...