How do you get a nun pregnant? You have sex with her

What's cooler than being cool? Being really cool

What's worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm in it? Biting into you apple and finding two worms in it.

A blind man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and after a couple hours he leaves. He's only color blind.

Why did the man go to the barber? To get a haircut

1+1 =? Too

If Jimmy has 50 pieces of candy and eats 40 of them, what does he have now? Jimmy has diabetes.

what did the doctor say to the woman? I have 3 testicles

You know what I hate long anti-jokes that take up too much space.

how do you get a baby to stop swinging from a fan whack it with a shovel

Knock Knock Who's there Bannana O He lives next door

Why did the white man go to jail? He broke the law.

What is the difference between a duck?

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

Pickup line: Hey do you like flowers? Because you stole my flowers.

what's yellow, dirty, and looks like a potato? a potato

Why did the boy have cable? I don't know.

What did the clock say? The time.

I used to be an inventor, but I had other ideas.

I saw a man lying on the floor. He was dead.

What do you say to a very ambitious dyslexic child? You're ambition is inspiring and I encourage you to follow your dreams. Some of the worlds greatest people, including Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison, and Winston Churchill were dyslexic. Your drive is much bigger than your disorder.

What's sad about an old black woman being hit by a Porsche? She was my third grade English teacher, and had a huge impact upon my life.

it depressed me to be diagnosed with depression

What does shit and fire have in common? Hitler gave both to jews.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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