Contrary to popular statement, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade," you technically can't do this because of the need for water and sugar to make lemonade. Secondly, life can't technically hand you lemons because life isn't a physical thing that can hand you lemons. So really, you don't even have to worry about the second two ingredients.

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A Mexican, an Asian, a black guy, a white guy, a Jew, and a hispanic............... i forgot.

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Why was Ray Charles always smiling? because he was a happy guy

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a chinese man and an irishman walk into a bar. This is odd because these men are from countries extremely far apart from one another

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buttcrack thumbs up

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Snooki want smoosh smoosh

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Eine blonde Frau mit ihrem Sohn in Walmart, da sie die Lebensmittel-und Getränkebereich zu nähern, sehen sie ein mexikanischer Mann Blick in die Eier. Der Mann bittet um Hilfe aus der blonden Frau über die Qualität von Eiern. Sie sagt, ABD Eggs sind die besten, so dass die mexikanischen Kerl entscheidet, dass. Beim Verlassen des kleinen Jungen zeigt auf den Mexikaner Jungs Hut und ruft: "Aliens!" die Mutter bekommt wirklich peinlich und ruft ihren Sohn für sein Verhalten und sagt, es ist nicht richtig. Die Mutter wird erleichtert, dass sie sagen, dass die mexikanischen Kerl konnte nicht hören, da er Musik hören. Auf dem Weg aus der Mutter entdeckt einen violetten Flüssigkeit tropft aus der mexikanischen Jungs Haar. Sie fragt ihn, und er antwortet "Sein das Haargel". Die Blondine und Sohn nickt und setzt auf ihr Leben

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What do you call a really old Cowboy? A senior citizen with a brain tumor.

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How does Bob Marley like his donuts? He doesn't, he tragically died of melanoma in 1981.

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That awkward when you adimaticlly read "moment in your head because you have seen too many of these awkward moment jokes.

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was blind and deaf.

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why do they call it history? Women didn't do shit

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Student; Miss, please may I go toilet? Teacher; Yes, but say your alphabet first. Student; Ok

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A father teaches his son to ride a bike. Father: Don't stop or you'll fall. Son: Ok, dad. They have a nice time,

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What is purple and green at the same time? Grapes, I lied about at the same time.

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A man walks into the market. He asks a young attractive employee in a smooth voice, "Do you have any honey here, baby?" The employee responds, "No sir. I'm sorry."

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dead battery come on down

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Segregation

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when geese fly in a V patteren why is on side longer than the other? not as many geese on that side

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Two boys are playing with a toy submarine. One isists it will work in a real test. The boy drowns and the company is sued.

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Why did your mum have sex with my mum? Because they're lesbian.

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How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

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What do you do when you need shade? CALL RAYSEAN

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What's awkward? Your phone going off at a funeral What's more awkward than that? Your ringtone is Highway to Hell

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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