Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son was captured by a sexual predator, and your daughter tried to run from them, and now she's under the wheels of the bus going round and round.

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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-What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. Animals can't talk dumbass.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody, you got ding-dong-ditched

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¿melano?

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Two Japanese men walked out of a bar. They drowned.

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What's white and sticky? A sticky polar bear.

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why is the name Brian so funny BECAUSE IT IS!

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A kangaroo walks into a bar, it is a fairly common occurrence in Australia and normal process is carried out of evacuating the premises and calling animal control to deal with the situation.

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Knock knock who's there? Hi! where from the church of latter day saints!

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Knock Knock Whose there. Mike Mike seriously I told you to stop coming here or ill call the police But I just wanted to talk to you Ok thats it im calling the police

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Why did Robert fall off his bike?? Because he was a potato.

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Sonic

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Your mom is so dumb that she doesn't get this joke

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Why do mexicans have so many children??? Because condoms resemble skinny balloons.

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Hi my name is Jim

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I have adhd theref- hey look a dandelion

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What did the Farmer say to his tractor? Most likely his life story, Farmers arn't always the most popular.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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A man walks up to a horse and asks, "why the long face?" The horse stares back at him, blankly. The man then sits and ponders his life, sad that he now tries to communicate with horses and realizes that his eccentricity is probably the reason his marriage failed.

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A blonde walked into a phone pole.

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Whats green all over and travels at 100mph A christmas tree in a gokart

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Why was the boy with a green and blue collared shirt holding a bottle of rice dead at the bottom of the sea? Because he was pushed of a boat and couldn't swim.

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what do you get when a bear and a man mix a really pissed off bear and a dead man

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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