How do you punish Helen Keller? Set a restriction on something she enjoys that is equal to the degree of her misbehavior.

A Tatooine moisture farmer, an old man, an astromech droid, and a potocol droid walk into a cantina at Mos Eisley Space Port. The bartender says, "Hey, we don't serve their kind here! Your droids will have to wait outside." The moisture farmer then says to his droids, "Why don't you wait out by the speeder, we don't want any trouble." The protocol droid replies, "I heartily agree, sir."

What do you cal a thousand black people swimming to Africa with a Jew under each arm? Waterboarding.

Ian is cutie!!!!!;)

There was a car crash in Mexico, 78 people were announced dead.

What is the Civil War called in Virginia? The War of Northern Aggression.

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

what did the frog say to the princess? nothing because frogs do not possess sufficient linguistic skills to communicate with humans

Your mom is so ugly that she decided to work as a prostitute and she died a virgin.

THere was three bees eating Honeynut cherrios one of them had a speech impediment.

Your mom is so old so will die soon.

asian drivers.

A man walks into a bar and says, "Ow."

Do you want to hear an anti joke? No.

What's the cutest thing about a redhead? I know, I couldnt think of anything either

How did the dead baby cross the road? stapled to the chickens foot.

The cow went moo

Whats the difference between a watermelon and a black person? Ones fun to hit with a baseball bat, and ones a watermelon.

So a woman is in the kitchen. And she makes the most delicious turkey salad for her 4 hungry children and her husband. They love Jesus

Why was the skeleton afraid to cross the road? He wasn't, and in fact was entirely unaware that said road existed given the fact that he was deceased; and therefore lacked any sensory organs and motor functions associated with crossing roads.

What do you call a person who uses food stamps? Poor. What do you call a black person who uses food stamps? Still poor.

John: Hey Bill, ORANGE you in the mood to go to a Phillies game? Bill: Yes! So let's make like a banana and raise our potassium levels drastically and leave right away to beat the rush hour traffic.

A horse walked into a bar. Animal control was immediately called and the horse was returned to it's original owner.

Whats pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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