KNOCK-KNOCK Who's there? There's a man after me, I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me! I'm scared, I don't know what he'll do. Let me in goddamnit! There's a man after me I was just walking down the street and he started chasing me I'm scared I don't know what he'll do let me in goddamnit who?

thumb_up thumb_down

What did Mulan say to Pocohantas? Nothing as they are nothing but fictional creation of the childish (yet genius); minds of the Disney corporation. Although if they were capable of empathy (which isn't likely) then they would still, say nothing, as they are from two completely different movies.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was the little boy sad? Because a stranger stole his shirt.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the man get hit by a van? He was blind, and his guide dog was an idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

This is a funny anti-joke. But you probably don't get it.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

In Capitalist America, bank robs you!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

So a man dipped his balls in sloppy joe sauce.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Your Mother is so pretty that she does not need make-up.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A straight man walks into a lesbian bar. He quickly realizes his mistake and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the bird fall? It was an ostrich

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What happened september 11th, 2001 It was my first time snorkoling in Hawaii

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Your computer will self - destruct in 5 seconds

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what do we want a cure for turrets! when do we want it C U NT !!!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

JESSSSIICCCCCAAAAAA!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What happened when Dave tried to break the record for most marshmallows in the mouth at once? He choked and died.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

killing a baby and putting it in one bucket is one thing... but killing a baby and putting it in ten buckets is just insensitive

thumb_up thumb_down -8

TRUE COMEDY: "HOW ABOUT THAT AIRLINE FOOD!"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

imadewords

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? 17

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead black guy in the road? It doesn't matter, I cried after both

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Asians are ugly and they look they have down syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do u call a gay guy with a long dik Dickgimme a lick

thumb_up thumb_down -12

antijokes

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops