When life gives you melons, you know you're dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Whats orange and looks like an orange? An orange.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Who is Red and White and comes on Christmas? A Russian Candy Cane

thumb_up thumb_down +41

I have the heart of a child... in a jar on my desk.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Whats the difference between pizza and Jews Pizzas dont scream when their put in the oven

thumb_up thumb_down +39

My wife and I have been married for ten years. She is a great care-taker and I couldn't be more happy. Then she asked me to make her a sandwich, I went to the kitchen and into the knife drawer...well I think you can guess what happened after that. I cut the meats, and I made her a sandwich.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why Because

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How did the fat man die? Clogged arteries leading to a heart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What do you get when you cross a cat with a log? I think the better question is why are you mixing those two things together?

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Q: What is green, blue, white and red? A: They're colors

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call a Mexican who steals a car? A criminal.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

lol

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How did Hellen Keller's parents torture her? They made her go to bed when she wasn't very sleepy

thumb_up thumb_down +37

I avhe dyiaexls.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What did Billy get his parents for Christmas? Billy's an orphan.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Jessica walks into a bar jokes jessica cant walk

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? I stapled it to the first monkey!

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What did the human say to the human? You are a human.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A horse walks into a bar...n

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Did you know why people actually fear clowns? Because slapstick humor is dead

thumb_up thumb_down +33

if life gives u lemons....chuck them back and say u wanted muffins instead!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the cat say to the chicken? Nothing. Animals are not capable of speaking.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? Neither have i

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops