Why did Johnny disappear? He was sucked into a vacuum toilet on an air jet.

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Whats the difference between a jew and a canoe? Canoes weren't killed by Hitler

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Awe the sky is crying.... No it's peeing

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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How did the mexican die while fixing a lightbulb? He fell off the ladder.

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what happens if you fart to hard? A.you shit yourself

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Why didnt Steve Jobs make an iphone 5? He died

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What's worse than a monkey attack. Nothing monkey attacks absolutely blow.

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You walk by a boy and see he is playing with poop. You ask the boy what are you doing? He says I'm building a office. You ask him why he says "because I don't have shit to make a building"

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Two kiwis are in a fridge. Suddenly, the door opens, and one of them is pulled out by a human hand. He was never to be seen again.

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man in a gorilla suit with a banana.

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What do you call a mexican and a African? Two people with no water.

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How do you get your dog to give you a blow job? You have to force him.

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What do you call a man with an eight foot steel spike wedged in his rectum? An Ambulance

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Violets are not blue They are Violet

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An alcoholic walks into a bar. He wakes up the next morning in a jail cell covered in blood. 3rd time this week.

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A man walks into a bar. It resulted in a concussion and 17 stitches.

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How do you remind your kids of family? You brand them with the family crest.

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Why is is afraid of seven? Because seven is a date rapist

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A cow went into a meadow and ate some grass. Some time later he wandered off.

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roses are red, violets are blue, dandelions are yellow, tulips are pink, sunflowers are black and yellow, my dick is 13 inches long.

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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