How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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Two peanuts are walking down the street. One of them was a salted Peanut

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

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If a black person gets a tan, what do you get? A burned black sausage.

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

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why did dicks dicks the dicks dicks? because you're gay and dicks

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what do you do when see a young girl crying on the swingset? ask her kindly to move, as you would like a turn

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Why did the deer cross the road? It didn't, the animal species is incapable of having a logical reason to possessing the will to cross a road. ruhtard

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how do you drown a blonde in a kitty pool? put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom

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Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

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Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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why was the little boy happy? Because he wasn't in the penn state locker room.

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A duck walks into a bar and says, "Put it on my bill"

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Are you antijoke.com. Because you are a faggot.

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Oh, no! There is a ginger jew within 2 meters of me!

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We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

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A guy, arriving at the pearly gates of Heaven, asks St. Peter "Why did I die? Why me." St. Peter replies: "You died the same way everyone does. Lack of oxygen to the brain."

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What do you call a bunch of spics playing soccer? Professional soccer players.

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass...i lied about the wheels

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Put down your barbie. Get in the car.

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Two men walk into a bar. An hour later another man sees them knocked out on the ground. Q: What Happened A: They walked into a BAR.

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Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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Why didn't the black man make it into heaven? No one did, there is no evidence supporting the existence of an afterlife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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