what happens when an Asian and a Jew get married. They have children.

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whats big fat round and bounces on the ground? a ball and your mum

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Q:John has 50 candy bars and he eats 45, what does john have? A: Diabetes

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As we had been trying for some months now, I called my wife to ask her the result of her pregnancy test. A stranger answered and promptly told me she was killed in a car crash.

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You know whats funny? Women's rights

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Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

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this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

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Why did the husband and wifes marriage fail? The husband slept with many other women and is putting his family through a hellacious situation.

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how did the fat man survive the plane crash? he didn't, he died like everyone else.

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What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

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Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

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Q. What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A. Cancer

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What's worse then three frogs playing leap frog? Nothing that would be awesome

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How do you get a blonde to tell time? By asking her what time is it.

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Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

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A: Where does a cow go on the weekends? B: To the mooooovies? A: No, to the slaughterhouse.

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What is funnier than an anti-joke? My SAT scores.

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How do you get rid of herpes? You shoot up the cancer ward of a hospital.

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Whats green, has four legs, and falls out of a tree? A Pool Table. Use your imagination.

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A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

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How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

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What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled.

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Why did the hobo break both of his arms? He didn't like them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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