I thought about taking a nice warm shower, but then I realized that the power was out and it would probably be a cold shower.

Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

Why did the turtle cross the road? Because there was a chicken stapled to his face.

whats brown and stick? brown paint that has not dried yet.

what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

boling water: why is it taking so long for you to get hard? egg: sorry, it's just because i recently got laid by a chick.

How do you get a blonde to tell time? By asking her what time is it.

Roses are reb, Violets are dlue, Forgive my spelling, I'm byslexic.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced to against his will by a group of marauding ninjas who happened to be strolling by at the time.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died.

what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

Hickory Dickory Dock Three mice ran up a clock The cluck struck one But the two other got away with minor injuries

What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

what is the worst thing to find out about for wife she is your arm

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

He who laughs last...is not a laughing owl because they're extinct.

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

How do you stop birds from building nests in your grill? You turn the grill on

What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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