Why did the black man commit suicide last tuesday? he was just fired from his job, his sister passed away, and he became depressed

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Why was the young child dead in the middle of the road? His mother wasn't there to prevent him from chasing the ball across the road, and therefore, he ran in front of a truck

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knock knock whos there? your dr you have cancer

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How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

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A blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who hits the ground first? The one that jumped first

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A: What do you call a female bombing the white house? Q: A terrorist

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the power to turn magnetism into light

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Why don't Catholics allow people to wear condoms? Because they get stuck in the alter boys braces.

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What's big and green and I gets stuck in your teeth will kill you? A tractor

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How do you make a fat man cry? You call him fat.

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Q: why did the black guy die? A: he got shot

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Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

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This is a joke about Helen Keller. "Knock knock" "Who's there?

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Who do u talk to when everyone is ignoring you? Nobody will talk to you so what's the point?

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In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

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What has feet, but no legs? An alien.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What did the vampire use to make tea? Hot water, a kettle, and some nice green tea leaves given to him by his great uncle for kwanza.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from a Black family reunion.

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hey whats your name Im gonna hit you so hard........ that im gonna knock your block off

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There was a man driving his truck down a dark road, half way down the road he see's a man walking alone. He stops beside him, winds down his window and says "Oi mate, need a lift"? The man replies "yeah sure, but can i sleep in the back of the truck"? The driver replies "Yeah sure" later on as the man is sleeping he hears a big bang. "what was that" the man asks. The driver says "Don't worry i just hit a cow, go back to sleep". time goes by and he hears another bang. "W-what was that". "Don't worry i just hit a moose, go back to sleep and ill wake you when we arrive". Few moments latter he hears a tick tick bang. He gets up and yells "What was that"? The driver replies "Dont worry mate i just hit a aboriginal" The man replies "What was those two ticks before that"?. The driver says "I had to drive through two fences to hit the bastard"

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What is the crunchiest part of a Vegetable? It depends if by Vegetable you mean the food or the disabled human incapable of carrying out simple, daily tasks, in which case this joke would be referring to canibalism.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I would love you But you are too ugly and overweight

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What happed when the homeless shelter went out of business? -Everyone went hungry and died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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