What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

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Whats worse than suicide? death

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: toothpaste

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Why did Johnathan drop his popsicle? He was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Johnathan

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How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into another apple and finding the other half

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Blonde Girl: Why is this green-painted man throwing forks at me?! Green-Painted Man: It is confusing you, no?

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Q: How many licks does it take to the center of a tootsie pop? A: At least one.

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what is worse finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grub in your apple.

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A heavily drunk man walks into a bar and proceeds to die of alcohol poisoning.

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Intercom:ALERT! THERES AND EXTREIMEST IS THE SCHOOL! Little kid: Sir, can I borrow that towel on your head? BOOOOOOM!

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whats shaped like a tree. A tree.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was clumsy.

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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So a blonde a, a red head, and a brunette crash land on an island, they all died within a week...

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Kinky = using a feather Perverted = using the whole chicken Weird = using chicken bones Downright disgusting = all of the above, plus a cat

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead become stranded on a desert island. As they are searching for food and shelter, they come across a mystical-looking lamp. They rub the lamp, but nothing happens because genies don't exist.

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Chuck Norris has normal human strength.

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Why was the camel sad he wasnt, camels dont have feelings

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What do you call a black man in a suit and tie? Presumably affluent

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I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

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Yo mama so fat she runs the risk of stroke, heart disease, or diabetes

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Your moma so ugly she should go see a plastic surgeon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops