what did the chickpea say to the raison when he got called big but? Atleast i dont have a stick up my but.

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I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

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What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

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roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.

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Yo mama is so fat, she just had a heart-attack.

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A man goes to the store to buy a kitten. While there, he decides to buy two because he is feeling particularly hungry.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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HELP!!! I locked myself in my bathroom and can't get out! my laptop is running out of batteries!

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A depressed horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "Millions of years of natural selection." The horse then tries to drink away his sorrows, but the alcohol is only a temporary release from the pain he's feeling. He kills himself the next day.

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Why was the chair spinning Cause it wants to

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Sandwich.

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Q: Were yyoouu talking smack about me? A: what? Q: did i studder? A:yeah you said yyoouu Q: well were ya A: no Q: oh ok.. A: k bye..

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Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

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it was christmas and the kid waited all night. finally santa came.....

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why was the boys t.v broken? because he through it out the window

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Its alright for you to act like a bitch but its not allright for me to call u one

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How do you confuse a blonde?? Throw her in a circle room and tell her to find all the corners If she comes out and says I found the corners.. then your screwed

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Cat ate a battery, did volts.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are polemicists.

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What do a blonde and a door knob have in common? Everybody gets a turn

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Haiku's aren't real poems. No body understands them. My soul is burned toast.

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what happened when u got some swag? i don't know u still don't have any

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what bounces and is blue all over? a blue bouncy ball

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We spent trillions of tax payer's money on the death of 1 man... wait that's not funny...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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