See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

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why did sally fall of the swing? because she had no arms... knock knock? (whos there) not sally

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try and get hit by a car.

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Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

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copy me and i will kill you

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What do you call a black person who puts out fires? a firefighter

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Why did the little boy lose his fingers? He was left unattended with a chain saw.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill. But it was winter and they froze to death

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Knock Knock there's a doorbell

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whats black, white, and bloody all over? i don't know, but we should stop making jokes and help it already.

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What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

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Why didn't the boy answer the phone when it was ringing? Because he had no arms to pick it up.

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Why did the chicken not make it across the road? Because he got hit by a transport.

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What did the orphan say to his parents? nothing

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Blonde: Where's the ice? Asian: In the freezer.

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing set? Because she didn't have any arms.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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How do you make a white girl commit suicide? Bully her.

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Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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knock, knock who's there you yoohoo i don't like chocolate milk!

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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Why did the monkey ride a bike? Because he was taken from his natural environment, abused for years and forced to ride a bike.

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- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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