What do you say to a corpse? How's life?

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How do you make a fake baby cry -Put batteries in it. How do you make a real baby cry? -Put batteries in it.

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What's the object with the most points according to science and math? A sphere.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

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How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

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Q: How do you make Osama Bin Ladin happy? A: Take him out to a nice seafood dinner free of charge.

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why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Kirstie Alley is soooo fat! How fat is she? Well, she's so fat that she's in grave danger of developing heart disease, and death

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What's Green and has four wheels? A green car

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We've just had sex, Now you have aids too....

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Do you know what one golf ball said to the other? Nothing they are lifeless objects

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99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer, take one down pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall. 10 minutes into the song one man succumbs to alcohol poisoning.

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Today we eat large amounts of pizza. The one piece had a lot of mushrooms. Like more than the other pieces. The cheese was flawless except for the burnt edges.

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White men's rights

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A young boy had a question and looked into the sky then his eyes got burnt from the sun and he went blind.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a clown, and clowns are scary.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn the people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? cause he had mad-cow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican Cross the road? He was on His way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was walking to his car, racist....just kidding, he was on his way to rob a bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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Did you hear why the peanut got arrested by walking next to another peanut? One got a-salt-ed

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Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge.

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What do you call a black man with a guitar? His name

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KANE TUCKER HAS A CHODE THE SIZE OF HIS FINGER NAIL

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops