Why didn't Josh go to school? On his way to school, a majestic flying homeless man hit him in the head with a sea cucumber.

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What did the chicken say when it finally crossed the road? - nothing, its a chicken

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Do you know why one side of the V formation that geese fly in is longer than the other? Because there's more geese on that side.

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Why did the deer cross the road? To cause the car crash that killed my father when i was just 15 years old.

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How do you help a one-armed man down from a tree? Wave.

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You're such a dork you were found on the bottom of a whale.

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How did the clown get the baby to stop crying? He hit it with an axe.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had been running in the road's direction for some time, and continued travelling in that direction despite the road being in the way.

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Look at the next joke.

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1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

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Your mumma is so fat that she wears large clothes.

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What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sorry, wrong house.

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What did the Irishman say to the German? "Sorry, do you have the time?"

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Yo mamas so tan she might get skin cancer

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A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

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I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

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dont you hate it when your reading something and it doesnt end the way you cactus

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

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A Muslim walks into a public library. 32 people killed in the explosion.

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boys go to college to get more knowledge. Girls go to Jupiter to work in the kitchen.

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what did the rabbi say to the priest? jesus christ, your breath stinks.

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Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops