A bar walks into a man

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what is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

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What did the def blind mute kid get for christmas? He doesnt know either

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The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

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What did the mexican say to the black person? Hey there! How are you today?

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Why did the girl fall off the swingset? Because she got hit by a refridgerator.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. That is highly improbable, due to the fact he is in a wheelchair.

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Q:What did Batman say to Robin just before they got into the Batmobile? A:"Robin get in the Batmobile"

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how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

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roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

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What did the mom tell her son who she caught masticating loudly? "Do it with your mouth closed!"

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Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. I don't believe you.

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who is not good looking? mon morello

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Why did the alcoholic stumble into a bar? Because he was bleeding profusely and was desperately seeking a telephone to contact the nearest hospital.

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A blonde walks into a bar ouch

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What's the difference between a melon? One of its halves are both the same.

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What's worse than having your t.v. stolen by a Mexican? Getting raped with a chainsaw.

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-Is your refrigerator running? -Yes. -Just wondering.

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Knock Knock The doors already open

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My granddad fell down the stairs the other day... Yeh, we didn't find it very funny either.

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A man walks into a bar, politely orders one drink, sips it while having social conversations with his peers, pays his tab, and goes to take the bus home. I can respect that.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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