Why did Jill fall off the swings? -Because she had no arms. Knock Knock? --Who's there? Not Jill. What did Jill get for Christmas? -What? I don't know. She couldn't open it.

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A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

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http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/resources/2008/04/Deer_mating2.jpg

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

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If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

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You wanna know who else messes around a lot? My mom. Do you know who else has the best tacos in town? My mom. Do you know who else doesn't have time for this? My mom. She's a very busy woman; dealing with matters you'd expect a recently divorced mother would have to carry on her shoulders.

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How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

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How long does it take for a dead baby to explode in the microwave? I don't know; I was too busy masturbating.

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so a guy walks into a bar, he says nothing for he now has a concusion

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Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

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How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

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What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

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what do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind

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What gets bigger and bigger and bigger, then dies? A baby.

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Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

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Why did the atheist start snoring in his sleep? He has a naturally small airway and fairly large tonsils.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

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Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

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A man walks into a Library.... And asks for a book.

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How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

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Your dad is so old, he should go to a nursing home.

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What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

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What's white and gluey Glue

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Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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