why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was taped to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? it didn't

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What did the man with one arm get for Christmas? A benchpress

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A group of cows boarded a spaceship and was launched into orbit around the Earth. It was the herd shot around the world.

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A wild bear walks into a bar, grabs a drink and looks at the man next to it. The man then wakes up from a dream and gets ready for work.

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one time someone wrote an anti-joke, hoping for lots of likes, which give one a sense of validation. nope.

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School

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Two antennas falls in love. They get married. The wedding was horrible, but the reception was great.

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You know what he said? How did you know what he said?

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Why did the Hispanic woman cheat on her husband? Because he couldn't maintain an erection, was boring, and collected stamps.

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The Labour Party.

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what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

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why did the guy get pulled over he had a broken tail light

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yo momma is so stupid she went and got her self checked for mental retardedness and it turns out she happens to be autistic.

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How do you drown a blonde? hold her head down until she stops breathing

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Your momma is so short, she needed my help to reach something off the top shelf.

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What do you call a white man takeing orders from a black man? Batman and robin

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theres no 'I' in 'team' but theres an 'I' in 'hitler'

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How to stop a baby from crying? Hit it with a brick

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What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

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What do you get when you cross a Zebra with a Sheep? Hounded by a religious group for playing God.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house. knock knock..... who's there? the chicken

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raising eyebrows to expose eyes can also be a signal of attraction ('I'm looking at you, gorgeous. Can you see?').

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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A blind man walks past a fish market then says "why hello lady's" ????

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops