Whats bigger than a toaster and smaller than an oven? ... ... ... ... ... ... ... .... .... . ... . . . ..... ...... ..... a microwave . ..... . ... ...

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knock knock whos there? dave dave who ? dave starts to cry because his grandmothers oldtimers has restricted her from remembering her grandson dave.

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Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

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What is black and blue and red all over? My wife.

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How much cabbage is in sean's teeth? lots, like it's rotting in there

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Why did the black guy drink the kool aid? Because there was a glass of kool aid next to him and he was thirsty.

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Statistically, 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape

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Q: Why did the Creeper explode? A: Cause you invaded and took his land that was rightfully his. He's not the monster, You are!

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Q:What is yellow and has wheels A: A banana I was joking about the wheels

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Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

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What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

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Little kid asks his mom: "Why do zombies eat people?" His mom says: "Becasue honey, your MEAT"

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Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

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Knock Knock Who's There No-one your not very popular

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i like going to public parks and watching the kids run and yell because they dont know im using blanks

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Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

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Three kids are playing on the swings. One of the kids falls off. He then gets up, gets back on the swing and continues playing.

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Give one reason for not visiting a hotel. Basil Fawlty is the manager.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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once upon a time a guy thought he wrote an original anti joke but it wasnt

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What did one cow say to the other cow? Nothing. Cows do not possess the ability to speak.

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I named my cat Pounce because she jumps. In retrospect I suppose most cats do jump, in fact, they are even known for it.

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Arab 1: Du good bai me, and I'll du good bai you. Arab 2: Ye men, sounds good men. Arab 3: O man, no way. Arab 4: K, u wait...jus wait n see.. Arab 5: I no interest! Me so saudi! Arab 6: D'oh...ha, ha, haa! Arab 7: This is so bahrain...I'm going to go club some protesters.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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