How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

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hmm, thinking, thinking, SNAPPLE!

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If Waldo and Carmen Sandiego had a child it would be fictional.

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Q: why did the black man kill the white man? A: he was clinically depressed, mentally unstable, and had a grudge against the white man that had nothing to do with his race.

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Why did the tourist cross the road? He was sightseeing.

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Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell off and bumped his head Mama called the doctor an the doctor said, "I am calling Child Protection Services."

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This would be racist to black people if they could read.

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What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a screaming goat

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Knock Knock Opens door because they were expecting visitors

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Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

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Call of Duty Infinite Warfare

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why does the man appear fat he is

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Why does everyone treat Jesus as some sort of saint for making five thousand people bread, when Hitler made six million people toast?

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

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Knock knock! Who's there? F*ck. F*ck who? F*ck you.

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Coach walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, i can't serve you. You aren't wearing pants. Coach says "put it on my bill."

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how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

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Why does the rabbit go in the hole? because that's where it lives.

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A man walks into a bar and breaks his nose, he asks the bartender for help The bartender says "no you're a f***ing idiot"

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: An Elephant was sitting on his face

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How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

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A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

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What do you get when you cross a crocodile and a couch? A coat because vests don't have sleeves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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