You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

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What's worse than a rapist? 2 rapists

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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Yo mama so fat - - That your dad left her, and it's tearing your family apart

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Whats wrong Nero? What happened? Please pick up the phone, I am trying to call you, but it just goes from dialing to changing tunes, please do not be upset with me, what did I do wrong? I thought we had an understanding, please just pick up the phone, if you already have my number and all you got nothing to lose...

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Why didn't the Mother packed her son's lunch? Because her son Timmy likes to go to the canteen

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how much kush does it take to get kushagra high

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, come at me again and I'll punch you

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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HOW TO RE-AD : FOR DUMMIES. (HELLEN KELLER ADDITION)

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What does "Fiat" stand for? "Fabbrica Italiana Automobili Torino."

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Once upon a time, there were a lot of Jews......

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What is the difference between a black person and a pizza? Nothing, they both taste like chicken

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, I have a retinal hemorrhage

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Get Outta Here We're Closed!

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What did the man say when he found a bar of soap in his mailbox? Why is there soap in my mailbox?

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Joker: Knock knock Batman: Who's there Joker: Not your parents

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What is big has a red nose and is funny Don't ask me I have never been out of my house

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How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With a blindfold.

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When writing haikus Sometimes, I miscount the syllables See, that line has eight.

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Why was the blonde on the train tracks? Because she was tied up by a madman on crack.

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black people

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Hats better than a stick? A stone

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How did little Sally break her Nintendo DS? Her abusive father repeatedly abused her and punished her until she was thrown into a stone wall. As she went into the wall she crushed by another wall and broke the DS.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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