Why did the blond woman throw a clock out the window? She was going through a bitter divorce, and didn't want her ex-husband's things in her house anymore.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? An even better question is why are the chicken morals being questioned every time it feels like doing something.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? The eventual extinction of humanity, followed by the death of the universe.

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Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and broke its head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be very mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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What's 2+2? Gonorrhea

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A dyslexic atheist stays up at night wondering if there is a Dog

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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What's the difference between a ginger and a brick? Bricks get laid

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a man was shot.... he died

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Why did the man with no arms fall of his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him

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Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

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Q. How many leprechauns does it take to screw in a light bulb? A. Light bulbs don't exist

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When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

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Why did the Nazi Doctor drown a Jew in the lake? To see how long it would take a Jew to drown with its big nose. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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What did the hedgehog say to the beaver? Nothing, they can't talk.

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You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

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A wise man once said, "I am wise".

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A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

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How many Druggies does it take to make toast. One.

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CNN has posted that the recent death of osama bin laden is comparable to decapitating a snake when really it is more akin to bisection of a worm.

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Whats red, black and brown? My anus after a Friday night

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Why doesn't the man like iced tea? Because he likes it hot.

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What's the most confusing day in the ghetto? Fathers day.

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Yo mama's so fat, that she died from obesity.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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