Q: How do you make Helen Keller cry? A: Casually remind her that she is both blind and deaf.

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Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

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If chuck Norris is so awesome how come he's not at my house slamming my face into the keybodhdtegdudgegdtdjaowpqhwvsmx vxbdnsksksh

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Q:what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile? A:get in the batmobile

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Your momma so stupid that it's really inspiring she managed to overcome her limitations and raise such a wonderful family.

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"Seriosly" You got a life buddy? Are you okay? Cant you see that I am totally rocking out on my imaginary air guitar which is now inside your mind? No you are not okay! Moral: YOU ARE NOT OKAY SPREAD THE WORD! INFORM THE WORLD! YOU ARE NOT OKAY! Moral2nd: "Seriously" though dawg, you cant keep watching over me all the time, I mean you I smell the hypocrisy, but are you guys AAAALWAYS HERE? DO NOT REPLY! WE REPEAT, DO NOT REPLY!rq

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A man walks into a library looking for books on poor punchlines. The Librarian directs him to the appropriate section.

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A man walks into a bar. And has a beer.

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar. The bartender refuses to serve her because she is not yet 21.

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Why was the man worried? because he had a shotgun up his ass

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whats black and yellow a chinese with a bruise

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Q:Whats evil ,not funny and on wheels A:The Holocost on wheels

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Whats worse than ten babies stapled to a tree? One baby stapled to ten trees.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I got Alzheimer's! ...... Who the hell are you?

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Knock Knock Who's there? UPS you have a package from Amazon. \ Oh, Thanks, where do I sign? Right here. Ok, thanks, have a nice day. Thanks you too.

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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whats worst then geting a used condom put in your mouth geting wraped by mario then lugi

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Q: What is harder than cleaning off baby bloodstains off a wall? A: Cleaning multiple baby blood stains off a wall.

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Your mother is so fat she has to have her clothing specially ordered, this brought her to a massive credit card bill and made your entire family bankrupt.

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What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

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What did the pedophile say to the delightfully curly-headed youth? Can I have fries with that?

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Come in! Come in who? I'm just com in' inside.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

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Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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