Billy and Joseph are playing Rock paper scissors. Billy says paper. Joseph proceeds to throw a rock as hard as he can at Billys face and sends him to the emergency room where he was later diagnosed with terminal testicular cancer.

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Beethoven! It is true? Did you really lose your hearing? Yes.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here." The other muffin doesn't say anything because it is a muffin.

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What did the dog say to its owner? well as you can see it is physically impossible for a dog to speak english or any other langueges such as french, spanish or chinese.

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What happens when an antijoke and a joke comes together? Unicorns mate with Neil Patrick Harris

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What's worse than Gordon Brown's face? George Bush.

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What is the difference between menstrual blood and sand? You can't gargle sand.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the engine wasnt working.

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What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

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What happened when the lawyer went surfing? A shark came up and tore his leg off.

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Lukas: can i have a cigarette? Scott: i dont know can you? lukas: may i? Scott: NO

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What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My D**K

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What has seven legs and cant walk? A paraplegic, and I lied about five of those legs.

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Whats Worse then finding a worm in your apple. Finding a real joke on anti-joke.com

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What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? We are both dinosaurs.

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Dubstep = a computer with a noisy virus.

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what happened to your carpool? they died.

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Why was the Muslim crying? Because his brother got hit by a bus.

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A man walks into a bar. He realizes that he would need a designated driver if he would want to return home safely. So he then leaves.

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What did Hitler get his son for Christmas? An Ez-bake oven and a GI Jew

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?"i'm so turned on right now." - horny light bulb

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? An opera singer singing in the shower

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dylan hodge wishes he could suck his own **** jokes thats what his mothers for

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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