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A guy with cancer walks into a bar... No one treated him any special way, it's not like he had I have cancer written on his forehead.

Why did i write an antijoke? Because i can't write real jokes.

How do you silence Justin Bieber? Hold his head under water until he stops struggling.

A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Skeletons can't move.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This joke is stupid, Chuck Testa.

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. Unless she's particularly short, then she may need to get a friend, who may or may not be blonde, to help by holding the ladder.

Friends are like potato, when you eat them die.

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The driver was a loaf of bread

What is the difference between an apple and an apple? One has a brown spot.

What you you call peanut butter on the top of a dog house Peanut butter

What noise does a Chinese roller coaster make? Chink Chink Chink Chink chink.....

Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Knock Knock Who's there? Hitler... Time to go to Aushcwitz

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm locked in someone's basement, Please help me.

Why couldn't Johnny drive? He doesn't have arms or legs. Why didn't Johnny have arms or legs? Johnny is a potato

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

What did hitler get for christmas??? Roughly 3 million dead jews in the ashtray

Why didn't Johnny ride his bike to school? Both of his legs were amputated. He can't ride a bike ever again.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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