- Anti Joke

you are getting chased by a lion, a tiger, and a zebra. What do you do???? Get off the Merry-go-round.

How did the old man die? He was shot after eating a rather large watermelon while skydiving out of a helicopter, boob fighting 5 toddlers.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his soon to be butchered family.

A man tells a blonde "you are what you eat" and she replies "well, i don't think I've eaten any sexy beasts today.'

Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

dont insult justin bieber, she has feelings too!

What do you get when you cross a gay man with a chainsaw? A decapitated homosexual.

why was the boy sad he had a frog stapled to his face

What do you call a baby with a shadow? A shadow-baby!

A dyslexic man walks into a bra

whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

a penguin biked to a bakery he walked in and asked for buns the baker said how many 12 or 13 the penguin said it don't matter I brought my bike

A boy with one arm walks into a rock climbing facility and quickly realizes that his dream of being a rock climber is impossible because he is blind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

I am dyslexic

How tall is a tree? Taller than the ground

What's worse than someone who isn't racist? A racist.

How many plumbers does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Plumbers don't do that. Electricians do.

What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

Why did the man fall off his bike? Because he wasn't on a bike.

What did Batman say to Robin before going into the Batmobile? Get in the car.

how do you find will smith in the snow? look for his teeth

what's 9+10? 19, not 21

What happened to George's pet rock? It ran away.