Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

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How long does it take a person to steal a television? Many variables could determine said ability to successfully steal a television. Such variables depend on sub-variables such as weight of the television, whether the television is a store, an upper-class citizen's home, or in a "ghetto" apartment. A main variable could be the race of the thief in question. African Americans are scientifically more likely to steal a television faster compared to a Caucasian. Yet a downside to being an African American is the fact that they are more likely to be called in for questioning or arrested on the spot at their broken down home. Caucasians are less likely to be questioned and if caught will most likely obtain the proper amount of bribery money in which to pay off the police.

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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person 1. Did you here about the black guy who went to college? person 2.no person 1. either have i whats ironic is that they are both black

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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A Jew man gets on a train. He sits down and a hour and a half later he is dropped of at his proper destination.

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Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

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Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

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Q. What do you call a gay bar with no bar stools? A. A gay bar

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I used to be an adventurer like you. But then I retired and started a family.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a psychopath

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What's worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust.

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Where do cows get cultured? They don't, they get slaughtered first.

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How do you beat Princess Diana in a car race? Challenge Princess Diana to a car race.

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what do you call a sick eagle illegal

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple, the enslavement of blacks over hundreds of years.

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Have you seen Stevie wonders new house..... It's ok he hasn't either.

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melons are berries, tomatoes are fruit, being a smart-ass isn't that good.

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Your mama's so fat, she can't even find clothes that fit her well.

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Q: Why did the Little girl fall off the swing set? A: She was Shot in the face.

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Yo mama's so fat, that we are all extremely concerned for her health.

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why did bob marley die because he did also he smoked weed he was naughty!

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Why did the money due? Because it fell out of the tree

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A clueless chicken walks into a bar. Now being cooked on the BBQ.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops