why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

Hey I just banged you, and it was crazy, delete my number, and keep the baby.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a women.

3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

Q:whats the difference between a black man and a bunk bed A: a bunk bed can support 2 kids

Britney got to the top of the building. What did she do next? She jumped off to end her miserable life

Why did the Fly die? Cause it died the average life span is 30 days.

A man says hello to his best friend in the morning like he always does. Why did his best friend not reply? The mans best friend is not real and is actually a figment of the mans imagination because he has been suffering from a severe case of schizophrenia his whole life and has many imaginary friends.

A blind man walks into a bar. He cannot read the drink menu.

What is brown and sticky?… A shit…

Why doesn't Caillou have hair? Because he has cancer.

What's worse than stepping on a piece of gum? A clown following you around all day throwing toothbrushes at you. ___ Zertop™

What did one alligator say to the other alligator? Ear

Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

ok guys finish this joke: Im the biggest fag-got because_____________.

Q. Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A. Because he got shot. Q. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A. Because he was stapled to the first monkey.

What's the difference between your garage and mine? A pile of dead babies.

did you know helen keller had a dog? neither did she....

So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Why is there a man painted green throwing forks at me

Two cows in a field one says Moo the other says, Moo

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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