What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

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Why do females have boobs? So they can breast feed their babies.

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What's 2+2? Gonorrhea

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Where did the paralytic go for a vacation? No where he can't move.

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A new scientific study has scientists baffled as it clearly shows that teen sex drastically decreases at age 20.

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Rose: Mummy, why did you name me Rose? Mother: Because a rose fell on your head when you were a baby Daisy: Mummy, why did you name me Daisy? Mother: Because a daisy fell on you when you were a baby Fridge: durr hurr Mother: Shut up, Fridge

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Some anti-jokes are funny, some are not!

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What's the biggest difference between white and black people? the melanin levels in their skin.

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Did you hear about the man who discovered the secret to making women happy? Neither have I.

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What hurts more than a papercut? A chainsaw between your legs.

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Knock Knock. Who's there *gun shot*

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What do you get when you cross a cheetah and a zebra? A dead zebra.

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

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How many Druggies does it take to make toast. One.

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Three men were on a plane. One chucked an apple out the window. Unfortunately, due to the low pressure outside, all the men were sucked out the window.

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whats worse than 100 babies strapped to an atomic bomb? 1 baby strapped to 100 atomic bombs

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why couldnt luke open the door? he had no arms

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Why did the little boy ride his bike to school? It was a birthday present.

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roses are red violets r blue jump off a building no one likes u

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It thought they were playing follow the leader. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the little girl fall off her tricycle? She was hit by three monkeys and a refrigerator.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

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What did the Fish say to the other Fish? Nothing, fish cant talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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