All Bin Laden wanted was peace on earth and good will toward men.

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Why wasn't the woman happy when she gave birth? Because she was thrown into a pool of semen 9 months ago.

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What do u call a joke with no punchline? An anti-joke

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Q: What happens when the Hydro goes out? A: The Hydro goes out.

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whats worse than 10 babies nailed to a tree? one baby nailed to ten trees.

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what did the man say to his cat? sex. -teagan doherty

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A Jewish man and a blonde were in a DIY store, the man buys a box of screws. The woman gets a phone call to find out her son is late for tennis training. She then hangs up the phone and leaves the DIY store with great hast.

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how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

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Hah, I bet a faggot that lost his balls in the war is "above" such things as seduction and all things straight! 25 million US dollars, send them to me within a week, or I will hunt you down by tracking down every single one of your fucking followers (all six of them), and make you wish you where dead. And tell me where you live, send me your sister so I can rape her, send me your boyfriend so I can cut him to pieces, send my your children so I can make sure your genes stop, send my your mothers tits so I can hang them on my wall, and kill your father and post the shit on youtube! Maybe then we are halfway close a settlement.

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Well, I guess it's back to the drawing board.

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Why did the elephant paint his toenails orange? Because he wanted to hide in the pumpkin patch

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A man walked into a bar with his parrot, a guy says 'That's a nice pet where did you get it?' 'From africa' The parrot said.

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What's green and frolics in the forest? A flock of cucumbers.

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A guy walks into a bar with a Donkey and a jar full of pennies. He walks up to the bartender and orders ten shots of whiskey. He was found dead the next morning from erotic asphyxiation.

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What did the Japanese man name his black baby? -Som Ting Wong :)

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How can you make sure your friend wont die of cancer? Decapitate him

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You're on a bus and the driver is black, you're white friend turns to you and says, We're gonna have a race on the highway!

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We spent trillions of tax payer's money on the death of 1 man... wait that's not funny...

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What do you call a terrorist on 9/11? A terrorist.

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And riiight after you... Hey its always ladies first.

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What is the biggest lie of 2011? "I do"- Kim kardashian

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Its Eliza, hope you are still there, would you mind getting here sooner? This site is not safe, besides its cold here, I mean send somebody else if you got to, I might look frail but Nero taught me a thing or two, so I can honestly say that Nero taught me better than you guys just in case. Funny you say there is no code, yet add three, yeah you better expect nothing "fancy", Mr.Torture dungeon master. Honestly though I do not blame you, and if I really meant you where a psycho, I would not have agreed/asked you showed up, I am serious I need to get out of here.

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Why did the hipster's coffee burn his tongue? He drank it before it was cool.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, your mother has AIDS.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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