Whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do u do when life gives u lemons?? Eat them

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Your momma so stupid, she dropped out of school at a young age of 12.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

If I tell you that seeing you happy, is my main motivation towards accepting right now, would you believe me?

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the pear tree say to the farmer? Go harvest that corn over yonder.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's brown and sticky? Dog turd

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A Chinese man, an Italian man and a French man are sitting in a plane. They arrive in Los Angeles with a 23 minute delay due to atmospheric conditions

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q:What do you call a sheep with no legs? A: A cloud.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you kill a baby? You don't muder is a sin and against the law

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Penis

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: If your 17 year-old-daughter is a drug addict, how many cartwheels are you going to have to do to make it to Georgia? A: The French Revolution, because your grandmothers facebook shows an 11 year-old selling Concords to a green alien, which can only mean that over 600 people watch porn daily.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you tell if a black man is ok? Poke it with a very long pole and keep your distance...

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you drown a blonde. I recommend that you do not drown a blonde because it is a felony. You could face 30-35 years in prison.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

why do ducks have webbed feet? to stomp out fires. why do elephants have flat feet? to stomp out the burining ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes people laugh and the other is a clown.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did Little Suzy get hit by a truck? Well the real question is, "Why was Little Suzy in the road," so why was she? Because she felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A black man and a white man enter a public toilet. They both begin to pee at the urinals. The whiteman peers over to the blackman mid-pee. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype and then blushes embarassed by his own latent homosexuality. They both leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself to sleep later that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

*Wear a Mario costume* What happened to Luigi? I ate him.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Colin is gay but toasters are not

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A bus crashes and everybody dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A bunch of kids are in a treehouse. The treehouse falls out of the tree and kills everyone in the treehouse and the two little girls playing underneath. It was sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops