A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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What did one cat say to the other cat? --------- Meow --------- What's pink and fluffy? --------- Pink fluff --------- What's green and yellow? --------- Grass. I lied about the yellow part.

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Q: How do you confuse a blond A: You don't they are born that way

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Roses are der Violets are eulb I am dyslexic

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A man walks into a bar. It leads to a fight that is enjoyable to watch.

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How does a dyslexic person read the word 'schitzophrenia'? Schitzophrenia. I leid abuot teh dyslxeia.

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bologna

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Roses are gray Vilots are gray im a dog

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Why was the Jew evicted from his home? He forgot to pay the rent

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How are baseball and basketball the same. They aren't football.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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THE GAME.

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one day a guy walks into a bar. he buy's a drink then walks hapily home by Mad James

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Why can't black people be astronauts? Institutionalized racism.

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Q:What do you call chocolate without a gag reflex? A: Choc-o-late (Choke a lot)

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Yo mama so fat she makes blind kids cry

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was very scary.

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what did the lesbian do with the other lesbian? played badminton

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What do you say when a black person is walking through wal-mart? Prisoner

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Many men trespass on my property to taste my milk based beverages. They insist that it's quality is superior to yours. I could teach you how to make such milk based beverages, but I would have to levy a fee.

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What should you give your Italian plumber for a refreshment? Water, because he's probably working so hard that he's thirsty.

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whats the difference between 69 and 6.9 theres a period in the middle

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your mums so fat! "last time i heard that i fell of my dinosaur!!" Oh man are you ok?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? They had a sale on dresses on the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops