What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari ? I don't have a Ferrari in my basement.

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i used to take arrows to the knee,til i took one to the balls.

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy.

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Recycled jokes are about as good as a scalar roundabout... [L]

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Why did a car full of African-American men pull up to a lonely white man walking on the sidewalk at 12 p.m. in Harlem? To ask for directions.

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Q: Why did the boy eat an apple? A: A strong man stuffed it down his throat.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

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Knock Knock Who's there? Yes.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Your momma is so old, she qualifies for multiple financial aid programs provided by the government.

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Last christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, you're body rejected the transplant and you died.

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www.hurr-durr.com

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Knock knock. Who's there- oh wait, I don't care. Get away from my house or I am going to call the police.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

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Why couldn't the pirate watch the violent movie? Because pirates died along time ago

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Your mom is so fat, she weighs 732 kilograms.

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Why don't women have breasts? Because they have dandruff. Get it? Hint: "dandruff" = "dan druff"

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What did the construction worker bring with him to work? - Tools

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What is the hardest thing about eating a vegetable? the wheelchair

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because apples can't talk.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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Why did Mary fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock, Whos there, Not Mary

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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