There is a tree. its still there. your still reading this, i dont know why, ok im getting sick of writing something that isnt even funny

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A fake pizza delivery guy goes to a party and tries to deliver DiGornios pizza in another companys pizza box. The party host calls the police and the guy gets charged for stealing another companys uniform and impersonating a pizza palace worker. He had to return the uniform.

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Why did the cow cross the road? The slaughter yard was on the other side!

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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what do you call a black guy with a nice car? most probably a rapper or professional athlete, however there is also a great chance that he is a doctor of philosophy and well educated.

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what is the difference between a dead baby in a bag and a dead baby hung in the yard....the dead baby hung in the yard was shot down off the cross after being rmr'd

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Q- Where did Sally go during the explosion? A- Everywhere!

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I walked across a lake once. Someone said "JESUS CHRIST!" to which I replied with "YES?"

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Why did the cow cross the road? It was escorted by its owner to get to the slaughter-house.

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What did batman say to robin before getting into the bat mobile? Don't touch my penis.

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A bear and a rabbit are walking i n the woods until they spot a magic genie. The bear mauls the rabbit because it is the rabbit's natural predator and is indifferent to the genie because it has no prior education on persian mythology.

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what do you have to do to confuse a blond? Nothing

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What's wrong with the axe murderer that lives down the street?? Nothing.

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Q: What do you call a dog with metal balls and two-inch legs? A: Animatronic

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whats thin, long and hard? A: a pen is

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What did the man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Oh my goodness! Are you alright?!"

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Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she is legally blind

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says: both your legs are broken in 10 places, you will never walk again.

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How do Helen keller's parents punish her? They sternly reprimand her for her misdeeds.

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

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Whats worse than getting raped by jack the ripper? Getting fingered by captain hook.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he can make before the car hits him.

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Why did the Mexican jump the fence? Because he didn't feel like walking around the house to the side where the gate was to get out of the backyard

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Slavery.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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