Roses are red, Violets are blue, You smell like ass, And no one loves you!

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How do you tell if a kitten is alive? Throw it at the wall.

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Honk if you're Amish!

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A cyclist looses control in a race. How does he stop? Run into the spectators on the side of the road.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? - Because it died.

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If an ice cream van goes out of business, who drove the Jeep into the furniture store? To get to the other side.

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You might be a redneck if someone slaps you on the back of the neck.

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whats does a dog cat spider and rat have in common?the dog cat and rat are all mammals.Exept for the rat idiot!!you should have figured THAT out before!!!

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What do you do to a brain dead man to get his money? Pull the plug.

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How many dinosaurs does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well, if you're talking about T. Rexes, you can forget about it! Their arms are too short to do anything! They can't even beat off!

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Why was the black girl happy? She got a raise.

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knock knock no no you go now i clean

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Why do girls enjoy listening to Justin Biebers music? Because he sings moderately well and appeals to a younger audience.

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There once was a student named Bob. Every morning he would rush to his job. But one day there was rain, He slipped in front of his train, There used to be a student named Bob.

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A Chinese, American, and German were all on the a boat sinking off the Border of the U.S. So the American called the U.S Coast Guard and they were rescued and taken to a nearby hospital. Two of the three members are still alive today and haunted by the memory of that day.

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a man walks into a bar he suffer's bad injuries by Mad

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How did the black man manage to get that 42 inch TV? He had been working a lot of overtime at work to try and treat his wife and kids.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. It is a coincidence that none of them have the same hair colour.

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Q: What's worse than a truckload of dead babies? A: Shoveling them out with a pitchfork.

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A fat man orders a pizza. Then after eating it, he gets a eart attack due to his high cholesterol and lack of exercise

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What do you call a woman that is on her period? -A girl that is expirencing a difficult to control flow of blood through the clitorus.

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your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it shows that she is overwhieght

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What happened when the football player couldn't get his Coke from the vending machine? He got angry.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I got pneumonia so now I am too

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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