What's worse than finding a hair in lasagna? An earthworm crawling into your ear and feeding on your intestines.

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Why did the weird alien jump everywhere? You probably don't want to know. If you learned why it jumped everywhere,you probably would make fun of it. I don't know if you know this, but aliens are sensitive. If you made fun of him, you probably would create World War 3:Humans VS Aliens.

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Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

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How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? Depends on how big the lightbulb is

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A black man walks out of a store. He was carrying a receipt.

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Wat do u call black circus clwon a bad comedian

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Why can't Sally use the swings? Because she has no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there?? ... Not Sally.

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Q: What's your dog's name ? A: Dog. Q: What's your cat's name ? A: Cat. Q: What's your dick's name A: Pinky

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

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What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

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Jesus can walko water Humans are 70% water I can walk on humans Therefore i am 70% Jesus

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Two kids walk into a bar and get arrested for underage drinking.

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what are three short words? i a am

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What do you get when you mix Obama and Chief Keef? OBLLAMA

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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What do you call a white basketball player? A very athletic hardworking dedicated human being.

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Where did the girl go when a bomb was dropped on her? Everywhere

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Why was the Black man running with a T.V.? Because he had just purchased a new LCD FlatScreen from BestBuy, and a torrential downpour had just began and he didn't have a free hand to hold up his umbrella.

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Poop

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I have a really funny joke.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Billy Sup Billy, come on in!

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What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? 2 weeks to live...

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why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops