How did the plumber fix the leaky faucet? Trick question. The plumber is actually an iguana.

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A man is driving and hits a woman. Who's fault is it? The man's: pedestrians always have the right of way.

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why was the monster truck late to the rally.. because it had no driver

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Q: What's worse than getting hit by a bus? A: Herpes, AIDS, Diarrhea, Constipation, Castration, Super Herpes, or the song "Friday."

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Two men enter a room. Two men and a baby leave the room...

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How did the cookie monster die? Diabidies

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What did the Nazi solider receive on his birthday? A bayonet up his ass.

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Why did the welshman cross the road? To violently hump sheep.

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What do you do when you say shut up to someone and they say make me? Rip out their vocal cords.

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What's red and black and looks good on a Jew? A bullet wound.

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Why did the black man approach a small white girl in the alley? He was knew in town and needed directions

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why was little jonny not playing in the baseball game? his legs were shattered in a terrible lawn mowing accident.

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A horse finds himself sleeping in the ocean. Immediately, he decides to be a dolphin.

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Mahmy

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Your mom is so ugly and stupid that people make fun of her and that's not nice.

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What comes after 69? mouthwash

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What should you do when you're constipated? Poop.

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Q: If your 17 year-old-daughter is a drug addict, how many cartwheels are you going to have to do to make it to Georgia? A: The French Revolution, because your grandmothers facebook shows an 11 year-old selling Concords to a green alien, which can only mean that over 600 people watch porn daily.

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Don't turn around when you're talking to me. Why? You will walk off of that cliff

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There once was a man from Peru Who dreamed he was eating his shoe He then shortly died in his sleep due to heart failure at the age of 81.

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What should you never give to your friends as a wedding present? An old plastic bag full of rubbish.

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A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane where having a bet on who could swim the furthest without getting wet on their hair. The Swede could have done better... The Dane did surprisingly well. The Norwegian, being bald, was disqualified. Moral: I still have some hair left!

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What do you call a poldo thats hafl poldo a

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How do you make time fly? Develop a flying suit to put on a sun dial.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops