Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

Thumbs up if u dont have aids:)

Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

I shot a bitch.

Why did Romney loose the election? Because Obama had more votes

why was six afraid of seven? seven was a sex offender

What's worse than dying in the holocaust Dying on the last day of the holocaust

You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: It didn't do it for any good reason,chickens are mindless and do random things,like crossing the road

Why did the little girl lose her necklace? Because she got her head blown off

Q: What would happen if you threw a red brick into the black sea? A: It would get wet.

what goes woof ? A dog.

If anything is possible try to staple water to a tree.

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

I saw 2 jews talking. I threw in a penny and watched them fight to the death. I did the same with 2 catholic preasts exept I threw in a baby boy

What's the difference between a dead baby and a tire iron? I've never forcibly expelled three tire irons from my vagina.

-how many potatoes are in a sack -5

Have you heard the one of the two headed man an the horse? Neither have I

How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? Depends on how big the lightbulb is

Q: What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A: A pilot you racist.

Why can't Helen Keller drive Umm, She's dead

Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasnt due to the fact that numbers have no feeling.

Why can't girls count to seventy? Trick question. Clinical research has proven that a fair amount of girls are, in fact, capable of counting from one to seventy using ordinal numbers in the Arabic numeral system.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...