What do you call a man that paints on a his face and wears big shoes? Lady Gaga.

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Why did the chicken cross the road---- because he's having financial and relationship related problems that make his life so hideously unbearable that he wants to kill himself and because he's a chicken and cannot overdose or hang himself he goes for the most viable option as to run across a busy street in hopes of getting smashed to oblivion by a car

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What was Helen Keller's favorite activity? fingering herself...

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What do you get when you cross a sheep with a lion? A dead sheep.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. The man apologizes, and the bra assures him not to worry. They both continue on their way. The man wonders what a bra is doing walking around unattached to a woman, especially this late at night.

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What's for dinner tonight? Your mom's vagina.

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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What did Dave tell me on Tuesday? "It's Wednesday, dumbass."

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a horse walks into a bar, hours later it walks out on two legs and the man who saw it all happen couldn't believe his eyes. The man then turns to the bartender and says, "I theenk eye've had enuf, Cut me hoff!"

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Q. Why did the squirrel cross the road? A. Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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Q: Why was the balloon scared of unicorns? A: Buses dont exist therefore the balloon was just insane.

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What's the best part of the 1980s? They're over.

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What's the difference between an orange? Two typewriters, because vests don't have sleeves.

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Why did the black guy wear a hat? To keep the sun out of his eyes

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What does a man want more than sex? Nothing.

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No, you would have made me unhappy and yourself miserable, until you truly value who you are, as we that still look up to you to this day, you wont see the greatness within you.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had down-syndrome

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What did the little boy get on christmas morning? Cancer.

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Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick !

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roses are red vilots are blue in soviot russa poem read you.

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A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

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knock knock whos there open open who the door

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how many milkshakes does it take to bring all the boys to the yard?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops