Knock Knock. Who's there *gun shot*

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You know what's funny? You got AIDs

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A black man walks down a high street and sees a white woman approaching. He bids her good day and they carry on their respective journeys. He then turns around and follows the white woman and rapes her in a dark alleyway, because as we all know, all black men are rapists.

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Guy at computer: My computer won't turn on. Help desk Guy: Did you try restarting. Guy at computer: No. The help desk guy hangs up and the guy at the computer proceeds to cry because he has failed.

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A man walks into a bar. He gets wasted and forgets the punchline.

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What did the lawyer say to a lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

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What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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why did the man shave his balls cause they were unnecessarily hairy

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Rose's are red, violets are red, trees are red, bushes are red, oh God the garden's on fire.

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? That whole slavery thing.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

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Yo mamma is so fat She has to wear big pants and is easily fatigued.

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What did the Fish say to the other Fish? Nothing, fish cant talk.

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Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

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Where did Susie go during the explosion? On her knees to catch it.

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When is a door not a door? Never, a door is an inanimate object and is thus incapable of transforming.

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What do you call a mexican man working at a Taco Bell? A young man freshly out of high-school, who could not get into college because his family is sadly struck with poverty. He also has a baby on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection when having relations with his girlfriend while he was intoxicated. I wish him the best of luck!

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

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How many pieces of toast can you eat in 1 year? well, it depends on how many pieces you eat in one day, does it count snacks, or full meals of just toast, can you eat even when your not hungary, if you throw up does it still count? If it is 1 piece a day, it would be 365.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Very, very hungry.

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Your dad is so abusive that he hurts you when he losses his temper

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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