Q: What happened to the man who died? A: Nothing, there is no afterlife.

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What did the man say when he put his penis in the blender? Arghhhhhhh!

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A Black guy and a Jewish guy walk into a bar. What does the black guy say to the Jew? "Hi".

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the best thing about an anti-joke is when the punch line doesn't hit you, you feel no pain

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Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

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Knock knock Go fuck yourself

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knock knock who's there? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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What's the difference between a hundred dead babies and a porsche? A porsche is a car.

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A chinese man walks into a kitten store. He is a nice man in search of a companion.

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A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

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what do you call a bird that is gay bird a gaybird

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Why didn't little Billy's parents get him the new toy he wanted? Little Billy's parents are dead.

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Whats worse than forgetting your first homework assignment of the new school year? Being hazed on the first day of school to the point where you seriously consider suicide

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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KNOK KNOK WHOES THERE APPLE APPLE WHO SEE THIS IS Y U BROKE UP

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A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

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How did the chef bake 20 muffins for the king? My name is Bob.

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what goes woof ? A dog.

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did you know towels can cause dry skin?

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What's funny about water, food, and shelter? Nothing, those are essential necessities to live your life, unless you have chains attached to your ankles with bricks on the other end and you're thrown in the middle of the ocean with no chance what so ever

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Your mother is so fat that she once ate an entire peach cobbler in one sitting and chastised herself yet again for her lack of self-control over her eating habits and her need to fill the holes in her self esteem with the short-lived gratification she gains from eating too much of the foods she finds tasty.

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Yo mamma's so stupid, she couldn't get a high paying job and had to settle for working full time at McDonalds, just to get your family through the week.

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how many dead guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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