What did the hobo get for Christmas? Hypothermia

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why couldn't the little seven year old girl paint her finger nails? She fell in front of a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

you...

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A blonde enters a bar and orders an elevator.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

why did the black man die? the man bled out, and doctors did everything they could.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the boy say to his dad when he realized he was gay? Dad, I'm gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: How do you confuse a blond A: You don't they are born that way

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the giraffe say to the human? Nothing, but it was trying to alert the human of an oncoming bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you get when you cross a rock and a paper bag? A rock inside of a paper bag.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Samraj.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I had 99 problems Solved them all

thumb_up thumb_down +12

1234567777777777777777778

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man gets a new job working for his boss. The boss gives him more and more work and less pay. The man finely gets fed up, beats his boss in a fight, quits his job, and starts his own business. Historians later speculated that the man's life would serve as a perfect national allegory for the USA.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did Biggie Smalls eat so much dark chocolate? His doctor suggest that he eat foods high in fiber.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's orange and fluffy? Orange Fluff

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you fit an elephant into a car? You can't. Unless it's a baby elephant. You would probably also need a convertible with the top down.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's the difference between Donald Trump and a refrigerator? Open a refrigerator and you will find food, typically refrigerated food like milk, eggs, you know, stuff like that.... When you open Donald Trump you will be charged with murder.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

UN

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A white,mexican and asian man are walking together on the beach. They find a genie lamp and the genie says"since there are 3 of u u each get one wish" the black man says " i wish that all the mexicans would go back to mexico. " the asian man says " i wish all the asians would go back to asia" and the white man says " wait so the mexicans and asians arent in america right?" the genie said "that is correct!" the white man says " oh ok ill just taqke a coke then!"

thumb_up thumb_down +12

If you have 12 apples and 7 oranges in one hand, and 9 apples and 10 oranges in one hand, what do you have? Very large hands.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are unintelligent creatures of instinct, and can tell no significant differences between the pavement and the road. It was unfortunate that a bus was speeding past at the moment this event happened.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats worse then Justin Bieber? It's a trick question, there's is nothing worse than her

thumb_up thumb_down +12

why did josh pick up the quarter because he's a jew

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops