Why did the dead baby cross the road? Cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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Guess who is violent. Osama

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what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

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what did the grandma do after she was pushing up daisies? washed her hands because gardening is a dirty activity

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Why did the Mexican jump the border? Because his mom told him the grass was always greener on the other side... She lied.

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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What do you get if you cross a bomb expert, and a homophob? a blowjob

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John: Spell IT Mike: Q-U-A-D-R-A-M-E-C-H-A-N-I-C-S

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A blind man accidentally walks into a gay bar. The bartender escorted him out and pointed him in the right direction.

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What is a 6.9? A period getting in the way of a good time!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being disturbed by two black guys raping a young girl with leukemia

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Your mom is so fat that she steps on the scale and sees a relatively large number compared to the rest of human society.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What do you call a puppy in alaska? A cold PUPPY!!!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was baked.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy became cold easily.

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What should you do when a man carrying a stuffed tortoise tries to break into your house? Call the police.

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How do you have fun while stuck in traffic? Play bumper cars!

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"....did he fire six shots or only five....." It doesn't really matter, considering he will die of blood loss soon

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Whats greasy and long? Your moms chesthair

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roses are grey violets are grey im color blind

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A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is killing is family.

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Random question: Whats black and white, green, and black and white? Well thought out correct answer: 2 zebras fighting over a pickle

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What did the taxi driver say to the chicken when the chicken called a cab? "aren't you supposed to be crossing a road somewhere?" Little did the taxi driver know that the chickens license was taken away for multiple DUIs because when his wife left him he became an alcoholic mess, lost his job and became depressed. But when he called the taxi, he was on his way to a job interview. Since he never made it to his job interview he soon went broke and lost his home. Having hit rock bottom, the chicken unawarely started to cross a busy road and was ran over by that same taxi driver.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops